A Parasite of a Son!

Cu-koo, cu-koo, was the incessant sweet sound made by the Koel (cuckoo bird) near Vikram’s house. Vikram loved the sound that cuckoo made. What a sweet sound he exclaimed and tried to imitate the sound which resulted in his grandmother who was seated nearby to burst out laughing. He stared at his grandmother angrily and stormed off the room.

Vikram was a 16 year old teenager and he was going through that awkward stage in life. His voice was gruff and he started to develop facial hair. Grandma is so mean he thought. No one understands me; everyone makes fun of me he thought to himself and indulged in some self-pity.

Just then the door bell rang. He walked up to the door with a grumpy face thinking why is someone coming now, why are they ringing the bell and why is he the one having to open it. Life is so unfair he thought. He opened the door and saw his parents standing there with big smiles around their faces. They had gone grocery shopping couple of hours ago and had come home with many bags. Why can’t you carry your keys when you go outside shouted Vikram with anger and disgust.

His parents came in and calmly said hi to Vikram. Vikram shouted, haven’t you heard me? Why aren’t you answering me? His dad was getting angry and was about to admonish him, when his mother stepped forward and said, Vikram, we were carrying so many bags, and our hands were not free, that is why we requested a passerby to ring the door bell. Vikram wanted to find a fault in her argument, but did not find any. His mother then proceeded to say… “Vikram, I do not understand why you are angry all the time. Is everything okay with you? Is there something which is troubling you and you are not sharing with us?” Vikram did not say anything and stormed out of the house.

His parents sighed and did not stop him. They were at their wit’s end as how to deal with him. Threats, bribes, and promise of reward failed. They even took him to a psychiatrist who could not be of much help.

Vikram started walking with mixed feelings towards the tree on which the Koel usually sat. He loved his parents, but of late he was feeling angry that they could not afford all the luxuries that his friends enjoyed. He had asked for an iphone and play station, his parents said no. He asked them to take him on a foreign tour, his parents told him that they were saving for his college and could not afford it. He asked for a measly bike which his parents refused citing safety reasons and also telling him that it was illegal to drive until he turned 18. Why do they have to follow all the rules he thought?

He sat under the tree and was looking for the Koel. What are you looking for? Asked a well dressed old man who was seated on a nearby bench. I am looking for the Koel bird that usually sits here replied Vikram irritably. I can see the bird clearly from here said the old man and gestured Vikram to come and sit next to him. Vikram walked upto the old man and sat next to him.

The old man pointed to a nearby tree and showed Vikram where the Koel was perched. The Koel was staring at a nest on a nearby tree. Is that a Koel’s nest asked Vikram excitedly. No, replied the old man. It is the nest of a crow. Crow! Why is the Koel keeping an eye on the Crow’s nest? asked Vikram.

The old man replied…Koel is a brood parasite. Meaning… it lays its egg in another bird’s nest.

What? Really? Asked Vikram with astonishment.

Yes! Replied the old man. Koel does not raise its chicks. It usually looks for a crow’s nest, and when the crow is not around, the Koel destroys one of the crow’s eggs usually by dropping it from the nest and lays its own egg. The crow does not realize that its egg is replaced because the egg that Koel lays is similar to that of the crow. The crow then warms the eggs until they hatch.

Vikram was amazed to hear this. This information was new to him. Once the information sunk in, he asked…so, once they birds hatch, the crow will realize that one of the chicks is not hers and will kill the Koel?

Ha ha… no, said the old man. Most of the times, the crow does not realize that its chick has been replaced because, the young Koel does not say cu-koo…but will say kaw-kaw like a crow!

Wow! This is unbelievable said Vikram. This does not stop here said the old man. The Koel grows faster and bigger than the other young crows. The mother crow has to work extra hard to feed it. Sometimes, the newly hatched Koel pushes the other young crows out of the nest to get all the attention.

If in a rare scenario, the crow realizes that the young one is not its chick, it continues to feed the young Koel and not stop!

Why does it do it? Asked Vikram? Also, what about that silly Koel? Why does it not take care of its chick?

The old man replied, the crow does it for two reasons. The first reason is because the crow usually does not realize that there is a Koel amidst its young chicks and as a parent, it makes it its life objective to take care of its young ones until they fly no matter how much trouble they give.

If the crow realizes that there is a Koel amidst its young chicks, it will still continue to feed the Koel because if it doesn’t, it knows that the parent Koel that you see sitting on the branch of the tree, will swoop down and kill all its young crows when the parent crow is not around. For the sake of its children, the crow toils hard for a child that is not its own.

Vikram was touched. The old man said, this is the nature of life. Parenthood is a thankless job.

But, what did Koel do? It’s not doing its duty…asked Vikram in an exasperated tone. The old man replied, the Koel is making sure that its child is being taken care of, and that is the essence of being a parent.

Vikram was overwhelmed. He suddenly realized how much pain his parents were taking to raise him. Yet, he was being a parasite like the Koel. He decided he needed to change and as he walked home, he was no longer a parasite of a son!

Free the Elephant!

Pooja is a quick learner and efficient. Put her on the new project ordered Swamy, the newly promoted Vice President of the Technology group. She however lacks the temperament to drive the project, find someone else to do it reasoned Swamy and ended the discussion.

Swamy was not very happy. He regarded Pooja highly and wanted to entrust on her more responsibilities. Her talent, skill, and potential were visible to all, but her.

He was impressed with Pooja the first time they worked together on a challenging project couple of years ago. He realized that she had a knack to pick up the nuances and had the ability to simplify concepts logically and deliver outstanding individual results.

He tried to reason with her many times and once tried to get her to lead rather than follow, but it ended up in quite a disaster.

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Pooja sat on the desk staring at an email. Wow, Satya got promoted so early in his career, good for him, how I wish I was as talented as him she thought. She recalled him being a nice and hardworking guy. She mentored him when he joined the organization as a fresher.

While she was lost in thoughts… Satya walked over. Pooja saw him and congratulated him excitedly. He looked at her and gave a sheepish smile and invited her to the party he was throwing to celebrate his promotion.

He then told her that this would not have happened if not for her. He said he learnt so many things from her and learnt the right way of doing things. He then made a statement which made Pooja think hard. He said… “Pooja, if I have even 1/10^th of your capability, I will go places. I always wonder why you have not risen up the ranks when you have so much talent.”

Pooja laughed it off and said Satya was pulling her leg. Satya with a stern face replied…”if only you knew what you were capable of”…and walked away.

Pooja went home and thought about it. People more often than not seem to be in awe of her and her work. Yes, I understand things fast and get work done. But everyone does that, how am I different? She wondered. Why do people keep telling me that I deserve to be in a way higher position than I am currently in.

Pooja was happy with her work, company, and salary. Her boss was always appreciative and took care of her very well. However, he lamented the fact that she did not think she was capable enough to handle bigger things. If things were forced on her, she usually found ways to let someone else take charge and played a supporting role. The management eventually stopped asking her to take any upcoming opportunities.

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One day, Pooja and her young daughter Sneha went to the zoo. Sneha saw the elephants and was very excited. She started asking Pooja lot of questions. One question caught Pooja off guard. She asked… Mom, look at the elephant, it is so huge and strong. Yet, it is bound by a flimsy rope and is tied to a piece of wood that is stuck to the ground! The elephant can just walk away, why doesn’t it?

Pooja had no answer, she was equally intrigued too. Just then a Mahout came over, Sneha asked him that question. He laughed and said…”Elephant does not know that it has so much strength, only we do”.  

He then proceeded to explain… The elephant thinks that it cannot break the rope and get free.

Upon questioning further, the Mahout replied… when the elephant was young, it was tied to a tree trunk with an iron chain. The young elephant tried a lot to free itself and failed. Eventually it gave up trying to get free as it thought it was of no use. When this happened, the Mahout started using a flimsy rope to hold the elephant.

Even when the elephant grew and gained a lot of strength, it did not try to break free from the flimsy rope. Upon hearing this Sneha bursted out laughing and commented “silly elephant”.

This was a moment was an epiphany for Pooja. She understood what her problem was. She had shackled herself with doubts that were not valid. She had to break free and she suddenly felt she could.

The next day, she marched into the VP’s office and said…. Listen… for this project to succeed, this is what I will need…. And on her way out, she said…by the way, I want to lead this project, leaving the VP behind in amazement and mixed feelings about her new found confidence.

Take a Minute…

Shravan was in the living room. Like Sheldon Cooper in the Big Bang Theory, he had his spot in the room. His spot gave him clear view of the kitchen and children’s bedrooms. The best part was that he could watch TV without the annoying glare from the balcony.

There was a wonderful aroma in the air. His wife Lakshmi was preparing his favorite stuffed bitter gourd curry. It was hard work. It usually took his wife around 2 hours to make that curry. He looked at her lovingly. She was a dutiful wife. He was lucky to marry well as he did. She was beautiful and also resourceful. Unlike the other “modern’ wife’s of today, she quit her high paying job on his bidding to take care of their home and two children. Was it a mistake…he wondered.

He looked at her closely; she seemed to have aged a lot in these two years. Is that a tear rolling down he wondered. He then convinced himself that it was the pungent onions that were responsible for the wet eyes.

He looked at his son Sridhar who was seated on the sofa with pride. He has become so responsible he thought. He was doing well in his studies too. Sridhar looked at him and commented… look here is your favorite player…Rohit Sharma. You were right dad, he commented just as Rohit hit a stylish shot that went scurrying to the boundary… Rohit has become the pillar of Indian cricket.

While he was still admiring the shot, his daughter Ria walked into the living room. She shouted hi and went into the kitchen. She commented to her mom that the smell was incredible and that dad would love it. She then proceeded to hug Lakshmi and both started crying. My son ran into the kitchen and joined them.

Shravan was wondering what went wrong. He stretched his neck as much as he could, but he could not see what the commotion was all about. Just as he was wondering if he should go there too, they walked into the living room, all three with arms around each other, looking at him with tears in their eyes and love in their hearts.

He was crying too, he wanted to hug them but he could not do a thing. Hanging as a portrait from the wall, there was nothing he could do. Today was his death anniversary.

He was a loving father and husband. He always put the interests of his family before his. However, everything came crashing down the fateful day when he met with an accident. In his hurry to reach home, he over sped and crashed into a median. His death was instantaneous, but his family was dying every day.

If only he had taken a minute, cleared his head, and decided that it was better late than never.

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This write-up is dedicated to my cousin Murali who expired in a freakish rail accident. Many of us take things and life for granted. We think we will be far from every harm. We tend to do small things which can be fatal. For example, driving without a helmet, speeding, drinking and driving, jumping signals, and not obeying traffic rules or any rule for that matter.

Life is a celebration which can end anytime. If it ends after living well, people will celebrate your life. If it ends abruptly, people can only pity. 

While you will make plans to live well, you never know when your life will get cut short. Plan for your absence too. Encourage your spouse to work, take adequate insurance, don’t forget to add nominees to your bank accounts, policies, PF etc.

Celebrate life responsibly. People are counting on you.

Where is the Happiness - Money?

My dad, in the recent past accompanied me to a Shopping Mall. While I was waiting in the long queue to pay the bill for the clothes I purchased, he was looking around.

When I finally paid my bill and joined him, he smirked and said, you people do not have happiness anymore. I was puzzled and asked him to explain. He pointed to the people in the queue and asked me what I saw. I was a bit irritated and said… I see people waiting in the line impatiently to pay the bill. He said “Exactly”.

I was unable to comprehend. On probing further, he reminisced and said… not very long ago, when people purchased any items (clothes, appliance etc.) you could see the happiness on their faces of having purchased something that they liked or wanted. It’s not the case anymore. Most of the people now run up bill in thousands, yet, you can only see the impatience to pay the bill and get out of there. Where is the happiness?

That got me thinking… he is right. Has money lost its happiness buying capacity? Or, do we have so much of everything that it does not excite us anymore? I bet it is the excitement and easy availability.
Let me explain… in the beginning of the month, my wife and I splurge on household goods. Money is no criteria. Literally! The reason being, we are blessed to be working in companies that give us more than sufficient Sodexo vouchers. We walk into a retail chain and pickup anything that we can lay our hands on (for my global readers, Sodexo vouchers are given as a benefit to employees to buy food. These vouchers are also accepted by retail chains instead of money).

As the month progresses and our Sodexo’s spent, when we require household provisions and visit a retail chain, we delve into our dwindling cash reserves. Its then we choose the required items wisely. We discuss the items that can wait for the beginning of the next month and the items that we require immediately. We make a planned purchase. My wife and I can then cannot stop ourselves from commenting on how sensible people we are, and how happy we are with our purchases. Every single item of purchase is discussed and every deal we got on the items is commented on. We are content and happy with the purchase.

What has changed? Did Sodexo not have the same buying capacity as the real money? It did, but why did it not hurt us so much when we ran up that huge bill? Why did we not have the same happiness? The answer is simple, with Sodexo, it did not feel like we were buying from our money and we purchased items without a thought. When we had to pay cash, we felt the pinch and that is why we discussed and decided what is right for us and hence the happiness.

With all the mindless spending that is taking place due to the availability of easy credit, people now buy things that they do not require. Not many years ago, buying clothes was a yearly affair (for birthdays, festivals, marriages etc.) and it was something that was looked forward to. Now a days’, shopping is a past time and has lost its charm.
I am not saying it’s wrong… all I am saying that the Money is now unable to buy happiness it used to.

If money can talk…. mine is only saying Goodbye!

Aam Admi - A Comman Man Hoping for a Change

It’s been some time since my last blog. Time sure does fly and situations do change.

So many things have happened in this short while. India winning the world cup, Mumbai being targeted once again, the markets crashing, disgusting stories of corruption, and heartening demonstration of revolt against the politicians and corruption by the usually submissive “Aam admi”.

Why is the Aam admi a walk over? Why is the Aam admi fearful? Why does the Aam admi bear the brunt of misfortune? Why does the Aam admi have to put up with disrespectful, agonizing moments of degradation?

There is no one simple answer. However, in my perspective, the answer is “lack of time”.

How many times have we heard the saying “An idle mind is a devils workshop”? We have heard it enough to have memorized it without trying.

An Aam admi simply does not have time. Aam admi is working hard to provide bread on the table, clothes for the body, shelter for the head, and insurance for the future. Aam admi is fearful of not being able to have access to the basic requirements to live if the time is spent on so called revolt against corruption.

Aam admi only wonders why is he being asked to pay up extra for no fault of his? Why should he pay an officer (who is being paid salary by the Government from the taxes paid by people like him) to do his duty. He wonders why can’t people just do their jobs and get on with it?


He can’t help but pay up the extra amount. The reason being, there are many jerks around who care a hoot for his predicament and have no qualms of paying bribe. This results in the officer thinking that it is birthright to not work without a bribe, and the Aam admi accepts it as a norm to pay bribe. The Aam Admi cannot say no to the bribe and risk his valuable time.

Things will fall in order only if all the citizens have a sense of duty. Perform your duties as required by you. I am as guilty as any of you offering bribe. But the recent developments have gotten me thinking. Seeing the support for Anna Hazare made me realize that I am not alone. There are millions who are frustrated with the oppression as me and wish for a change.

Now is time to hit back. The iron is hot. Let’s stop giving or taking bribes. Let Government officers perform their duties as per their role for the salaries they get from us. We rarely get chance to demonstrate our frustration, this in one time now… lets utilize it to the maximum and hope things change for better.

Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive.

Well Well Well.... Here I am writing my first blog!
I promised my wife (yes I am happily married since 3 months and 9 days)that I will start blogging from 9th but did not specify the year or the month.

Well I learnt it the hard way as what happens when you act smart in front of your wife... do you want to know what she did? Well, I would love to tell it to you, but I would be in even bigger trouble... so i'll let it rest for now and let you onto it as days progress.

My name is Vidya Sagar which means an Ocean of Knowledge! Well, to be honest I am an ocean in which the knowledge has sunk... I am still deep diving for it and i'll let you know when I find it.

My name has quite a story... My birth caused quite a commotion in my family as I was the only male child. Everyone in the family wanted to name me...what started as normal name suggestions turned into a battle of ego's. My 89 year old great grand mother (ggm) stood up from her cot and using all the strength she could muster ... yelled... well not yell exactly... she muttered SILENCE to her 65 year old son... my grand father.

She suggested that everyone should think of a name and should return in one week. They should write the name in a paper and put it in a bowl. She would pick one chit and that name would be my name!

Well... for that one week I was call little nobody... I was waiting eagerly for the week to end so that I would be named... you see I was anxious, I was tired of winning the competition (100,000 sperm and I was the fastest) and God wanted to reward me... but he could not as I did not have a name yet.

The week passed (I slept through it, I was tired you see) and the D-day arrived... My ggm acted importantly and started walking towards the bowl of chits. She started her 20 step journey in the morning and reached late in the afternoon. She picked one chit and gave it to her son who loudly said... this child here shall no longer be called little nobody... he will from now be called "vidya sagar".....well at least that is what he hoped. Well everyone calls me SAGAR... if you call me vidya sagar, I am guaranteed to ignore you.

So are you thinking why did I title this post as "Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive."
I did it because it's my blog and I liked the title :p. Now don't start taking it seriously.